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Published: Thursday, October 10, 2013, 12:01 a.m.

Am I blue?

Our story so far: The government is shut down. An economic crisis is approaching. And nobody is budging much from their position. What hope does exist follows a slim olive branch from President Barack Obama, who says he will negotiate with Republicans if they pass "clean" short-term bills to reopen the government and raise the debt limit.

The problem is, it's difficult to read the reaction of House Speaker John Boehner, R-Snit, because his tan makes it hard to see how blue he's turning from holding his breath.


Trouble brewing: Yet another casualty of the government shutdown, America's craft brewers have been prevented from bottling new seasonal beers until the Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau reopens to process label applications.

Go ahead. Close the national parks. Furlough federal workers. But the idiots in D.C. but not stop the flow of pumpkin-flavored porter.


Not amused: Twelve people were stuck for more than two hours on a roller coaster at the Universal Studios Florida amusement park.

The riders were freed when House Speaker John Boehner, R-Fit of Pique, agreed to turn the power back on when he was informed the park was not a federal installation.


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